Tuesday, November 17, 2020

Being a Better Parent While Doing Less the Right Way

We are in our own little bubble right now. We are socially distancing, wearing masks, and keeping our public outings to a livable minimum. 

With all of that in mind, I definitely feel like my little ones are not getting the proper socialization that they deserve to develop good communication skills, manners, and self-esteem. 

I found myself in the same shoes of other parents who claimed that their older children have regressed in their development due to the observation and then mimicry of their little sibling demanding everything and getting everything within reason. 

Just the other day my child demanded that I should get something for him from the fridge. Mind you, he does not have any issues with opening, finding, and getting what he wants. He just knows that his brother gets all that he needs just by babbling. And here my toddler was using full sentences with his whole heart. Surely, he was going to get some string cheese. 

No. 

No he was not. 

A long time ago, reading "Montessori from the Start" Taught me that it is easier to be a servant to a child than a teacher and parent. While I will give him all of the love in his own love language, I will try my best to do less.

And that is not a bad thing when done right. 

Regardless of parenting style, what we know, deep down, is that we are preparing our children to live in a time, place, and culture without us. This might be 5 feet away when they have their first playground altercation, or 500 miles away when they more away from home, or this might be the ever so depressing "without us" that I don't want to think about. 

The more they start learning useful and practical life skills, the easier the parents' lives will become and the more the child can learn more and increasingly complicated skills. 

Right now my pet peeve is potty training, but honestly, if I can get my child to learn his morning routine and the cues involved with everything except that, my life would be so much easier. So that is my goal for now and this coming year. I want to enable my child to do more self-care and eating tasks without my supervision. 

My ideal would be to build confidence over time in my child so that one day, when he can work with very hot foods, my husband and I can sleep in and to wake up to complete and delicious breakfast breakfast. A Mama can dream right?

 


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